I had no idea what Memorial by Bryan Washington was going to be about when I picked it up, but what I didn’t expect was a bittersweet, funny, and deep story about the crossroads of love, familial bonds, and what it means to be someone’s partner while they go through a hard time.
This story follows Benson and Mike, who have been together for four years now and who’s relationship seems to have plateaued. Both men feel a little bit stuck- they don’t want to leave because they love each other, but staying is absolutely draining for the both of them. Memorial was a beautiful commentary on love that just isn’t working, but the story ran deeper than that.
"'That's the thing', said Mike. 'Most ideas are good at the time. We don't find out that they've gone wrong until they actually do.'"
My favorite part about this story was the growth and healing that both Mike and Benson experienced with their families. At the beginning of the book, Mike flees to Japan at a moment’s notice to visit and make amends with his dying father. On the day that he flies out of Houston, his mother happens to fly in from Japan to visit him. They cross paths for only a couple hours, and then Mike is on a plane to Japan and his mother is sitting in his tiny living room staring at Benson.
While Mike is visiting his father in Japan, he inadvertently works on healing their relationship. Realizing that everything he understood about his upbringing was under the false guise that his father left his mother, he tries to spend time and fix their father-son bond before it is too late. As his father dies of cancer, Mike learns a lot about his past, his culture, and his dad. He works in his father’s bar and gets to know his friends, and feels drawn to this community he missed out on living in Houston for most of his life. Before he passes away, Mike’s father offers him his bar- his pride and joy. Mike is torn between continuing his father’s legacy and returning to Benson in Texas, who he cannot seem to part with despite recent disconnect in their relationship.
Slipped into the story are little lists Mike's dad left in a notebook- these lists of favorite smells, things he doesn't believe in, and things he will miss when he's gone made me absolutely love his character.
"A few of Eiju's favorite things, scribbled in blue ink: smoked eel,, tattered sweaters, the weather in late January. Sex before breakfast. Grapes. Leftover rice. The first steps taken after walking off a train. The first steps taken after walking off a plane."
While Mike is away, Benson deals with some familial drama of his own. He is exasperated with his father, an alcoholic who doesn’t want to take care of himself. He also has a strained relationship with his mother, who left his father and started a new family with a different man. Sharing a space with Mike’s mom for two months provides an interesting perspective of Benson’s relationship with his own mother. The relationship that grew between Benson and Mike’s mother for the two months Mike was gone was such an amusing touch to this overall emotionally taxing story. Additionally, the innocence and awkwardness of a new relationship tempts Benson, showing his raw humanity as he struggles to figure out his feelings for Mike and their future.
"What conversations do you have when you feel like there's nothing to say?"
This was such a touching story. I loved how it went back and forth between Mike and Benson, following their changing relationships with their fathers and with each other. It was a beautiful representation of forgiveness in all senses of the word.
I feel like I cannot give Washington’s words justice with this review. Mike and Benson’s relationship was so different from any I have read before, and there was something just so unique about this book that I can’t quite put my finger on. Maybe it was Mike and Benson’s hesitance to give up on what they once had, Mike’s dad’s stubbornness and dedication to his bar in Japan, or Mike’s mother’s refusal to admit her pain, or Benson’s pure relationship with one of the kids at his daycare. This is a novel you don’t want to miss out on- especially if you were a fan of Real Life by Brandon Taylor. The range of emotions I experienced while reading was so refreshing.
"And what have you decided?" "That loving a person means letting them change when they need to. And letting them go when they need to. And that doesn't make them any less of a home. Just maybe not one for you."
Rating: 5/5 late night omelettes
xx, Lauren